It concerns me that people read what I write and post in this venue that is open to the public. Oblate Offerings didn’t begin that way. It began as a simple little reflective means to share personally and intimately with a dear friend that lives far away.
One concern that I have about this is that I have an international audience. No. It’s not large like some mega-site but it’s larger than some of the churches that I pastored during my Protestant pastoral career. Some are frequent readers. Others stop by infrequently. Some show up accidentally, others curiously. Many don’t come back. A few leave comments. Most don’t. It’s amazing what a good stat counter tells you.
Over these few years of blogging I’ve had only one person roast me on a spit. He did it with a succession of argumentative and accusing comments. His last comment was an apology for roasting me.
I’ll admit it. I’m human and there’s still that carnal part of me that is capable of being flattered. There was a day when I would have really fed on this and found a self-righteous way to justify my vanity, a character trait that I’ve worked hard at overcoming, yet one that is still very much alive and at work within me.
Another concern is one that rests in the realm of personal accountability, one of those “be not many masters” things that the Apostle James talks about in chapter three of the little biblical book that bears his name. I live with a healthy fear of one eventual but certain day finding myself indicted for leading any one astray in matters of faith and morals.
I did in fact, a few months ago, consider taking a long hiatus, aspire more to anonymity and smallness, work at satisfying another character trait and become much more of a hermit-type recluse, and leave off doing this reflective journaling in a public venue altogether. It’s still a consideration but it isn’t quite as strong as it was a few months ago. Is this Providence at work or my own vanity steering me?
I prefer to think that it is not the latter in control of my little vessel.